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HE SAYS IT'S HALF PAST TWO, BUT HE'S PROBABLY LYING

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I'M LETTING YOU OFF THIS TIME, SIR JOHN CHILCOT. FRANKLY, NOBODY IS GOING TO...

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YOU WERE PERSISTENTLY DRIVING BELOW THE SPEED LIMIT. DO YOU WANT US TO STARVE?

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I WAS FINED 50P FOR AN OVERDUE BOOK. IT'S JUST A REVENUE RAISING RACKET

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POLICE APPEAL PLEASE FORGET EVERYTHING WE SAID ABOUT MR OSBORNE BEFORE THE...

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IF YOU AX ME IT'S AN HONOUR TO BE IN YOUR GREAT BOOK, BILL, THANK YOU FOO...

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THE OLD GUARD SPECIAL (ON DUTY AT WESTMINSTER): 'THERE GOES A CHAP I'D LIKE...

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LONG FLIGHT ENDED (WEST BROMWICH ALBION DEFEATED BY BLACKBURN ROVERS))

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OF COURSE YOU'RE ALWAYS FEELING TIRED - TRY CUTTING DOWN ON DAWN RAIDS

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THE SUPERINTENDENT HAS LOST ONE OF HIS CONTACT LENSES

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